Maybe this Time
by angeleyes4191
Summary: Lily's parents have just gone through a bad divorce & her mom has moved her to Lima, Ohio home of New Directions. At her lowest point with possibly some hidden talent Lily tries to make yet not make her mark at a new school. Summary sucks please read
1. Chapter 1

**Howdy...first glee fic, and I realize that its not exactly centered on anyone you guys know, especially this chapter, but I swear they'll be there. Please give it a chance, thanks in advance...I love rhyming :P. Oh and this story takes place during junior year for the majority of our dear glee club members...or all of our dear glee club members for that matter lol.  
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* * *

_If I could turn back time_….

Sometimes I wonder if my ipod can read my mind.

"Preachin' to the choir sister," I muttered before flopping down on my mattress that was currently taking up 90% of the space in my brand new bedroom.

For your information, my life was over….so utterly over.

"Lily!" my mother's voice called from the great beyond, interrupting my much needed Cher time and the pitiful thoughts of nothingness that were filling my head.

"What?"

"There's another box of your crap out here!"

I'm guessing some back story is needed? My name, if you haven't picked it up from my mother's screaming, is Lily….Matthews. Myself and my lovely mother, Jamie, have recently become husband/fatherless when my father, the charming yet alcoholic Mr. Mark Mathews, abandoned us for a plus sized yet gorgeous catalog model that he met at a county fair. She was judging the largest cucumber contest…it was nothing short of awkward….

Anyway, when it became apparent that dad wasn't going to come back and Jamie Stuart, formerly Matthews, realized that she was the biggest laughingstock in our quiet suburban neighborhood…a laughingstock that couldn't afford her mortgage payments no less, she decided that we needed to move as far away as we could afford. So, she sold the house and moved us about fifty miles away into a far more…economical apartment.

With her new job and new residence Ms. Stuart, along her vibrant personality, was set up and ready to go, where as I was left to wallow in my own isolated oubliette of despair.

Hey, I'd agree with the term 'overdramatic' if the situation was different, but you try uprooting yourself leaving all your friends and prospects behind you, as well as your dad, and see how you feel. I literally had no say or choice in this matter. I hadn't heard anything from daddy dearest since before he mailed back the divorce papers with every **I** dotted and **T** crossed. For all I knew he was living in Antarctica making whiskey out of whale blubber awaiting the birth of his Eskimo child.

Sighing, I rolled myself off of the almost floor level mattress and into a standing position before yanking open my door and heading down the short yet never ending hallway right into our box filled living room. Labels covered everything, but of course the box that sat on the floor in front of my mom was labelless.

This would probably be a good time for a physical description of myself since I was basically looking straight at my walking talking mirror…who was actually sitting, but you get the point. My mother and I share the same red hair (slightly different lengths hers was long, mine shoulder length) and bright blue eyes. True she had a few inches on me and I had inherited my father's evil button nose and hips, but other than that we could never deny each other. Sometimes I wasn't entirely sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

"Are you sure its mine? I mean, I thought I already hauled everything I owned into that tiny walk-in-closet that you call a bedroom." I said, far from gratefully, with my hands on my hips merely out of habit.

Jamie held up an old piece of paper, that happened to be the sheet music to 'America' from West Side Story, and replied with a clear "Positive" before replacing the music, getting to her feet, and handing me the heavy box. "Be careful, alright? Don't trip on anything, I still haven't found the dishes-"

She just had to say it, was the first thought to cross my mind the moment I tripped over a box that I had no way of seeing. Not only did I land flat on my face, sending my box and music scattering, but the evil box my legs landed on made a loud shattering noise at the moment of impact.

"Ow"

"-yet…Are you ok?" Jamie finished before helping me to my feet.

I took a breath and mumbled, "Yeah, fine…was that-" , nervously as my mom checked the contents of the box in question that was clearly marked 'DISHES'.

"Nope, it was the wedding china. I'd been meaning to smash every last dish to smithereens and mail the shards to your father for about a month now. You just got me started….Pizza?"

"Do you even have to ask?" The round greasy concoction of bread, tomato sauce, and cheese was exactly what I wanted to eat the night before the first day of my junior year at a brand new school, a school that returned 2 weeks ago when their summer vacation ended.

McKinley High…even the name sounds depressing.

* * *

Seriously?….I mean really….They throw slushies on people here? What the hell?

Its only day one and I want to commit murder.

I didn't even do anything. Really! I was just trying to find my way to Mr. Wilson's third period biology class when a bunch of random football players, I mean I think they were football players…I had never seen before in my entire life, dumped what felt like twelve super gulps of grape slushie all over me. Now I was freezing, sticky, my favorite white shirt was probably ruined, and I was going to be late for third period.

At that very moment I was in the restroom trying to wash grape out of my hair while simultaneously scooping almost melted ice out of my bra. Because of the cold my first instinct was to turn the** H** knob on the faucet when a voice stopped me.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," the reflection of a slight male told me before I turned to face him.

"Okay, I know I'm new here, but I'm pretty sure I walked into the restroom that has a stick figure in a dress on the door, aka the ladies room, what the hell are you doing in here?" Yes, I snapped, sue me. If I was in a better mood I might have remarked on how cute his violet ascot was, but now wasn't the time.

"As if I would venture into the men's room with those Neanderthals trolling the hallways. Besides, I only followed you in here to see if you needed any help, but apparently you don't want any." and with that he turned to leave.

But of course my curiosity got the better of me, "Wait…why shouldn't I use the hot water?"

"Stain basics 101, hot or warm water will only set the stain. You'll need to use cold water if you ever want to wear that shirt again." he paused for a second apparently noticing the look on my face. "Trust me, I had to find out the hard way."

"…I'll take your word for it then. Thanks…?"

"Kurt…Hummel," he replied with an adorable smile and nod. "And you would be?"

"Oh yeah, Lily Matthews."

"Well, maybe I'll see you around Lily. Tata for now." and with that he left me to my cleaning devices.

* * *

"You'll need a pass,"

"But I was sticky and gross and purple! I had to wash it off! Come on Mr.…Wilson, its my first day!" this really couldn't be happening.

"Sorry, rules are rules," and with that the short balding Mr. Wilson shut his classroom door right in my face.

This is the day from hell.

"Wondering the halls, with no pass or teacher escort,"

Oh please no.

The words were coming from the mouth of a tall woman in a red tracksuit who I could already tell hated me just for existing, "I guess I shouldn't expect anything less from Will Schuester's glee club gremlins."

"I'm sorry? I got slushied and I was just-"

"Slushied? Oh that's typical. You think a refreshing, ice cold beverage to the face is hard? Trekking up Mount Everest barefoot is hard."

"What?"

"I'll be seeing you in detention."

"But-"

Without a second glance she walked away, leaving me with three thoughts; How is she going to give me detention when I have know idea who she is and she doesn't even know my name? Did she really climb Everest barefoot? And, what's a glee club?

* * *

You'd think I'd be safe at lunch, but you'd be wrong.

There I stood, milk wetting my hair that had only gotten dry a few minutes ago.

"I'm sorry, I totally thought your head was on fire." a blonde in a cheerleading outfit mumbled as she grabbed a handful of my hair and tried to wring the milk out of it.

"No problem," was my reply as I went searching for napkins while the blonde and her friend followed me.

"Ignore Britney, she isn't even supposed to be drinking milk," Brittnay's obviously bitchy yet beautiful latina friend commented the moment I found a small stack of napkins, that I used to get as much milk out of my hair as possible.

"My mom's forcing me too,"

I stared at the two of them in confusion before saying, "Ummm, okay…? Excuse me," and once again made my exit only to enter the restroom.

"Hello pretty lady," wrong restroom.

Averting my eyes, I backed out of the room calling out a quick "Sorry," before pushing open the correct door.

If I had to walk in on anyone at that moment, I was happy it was the one person I was friendly with.

"Girl, you look like hell," Mercedes (I met her in first period….trigonometry) commented from in front of her very own sink.

"Thanks for reminding me…Do you think it would be weird if I washed my hair with hand soap?"

"Nah, we've all had to do it at one time or another. What did they get you with? Cherry, grape, or that funky blue one that they try to pass off as tropical punch?"

"Grape about an hour ago and as of two minutes ago…milk. Which was an accident, or so they tell me." I started before placing my head awkwardly under the faucet.

"Accident? Who did it?"

"Ummm…a ditzy blonde cheerleader…I think her name was Brittany."

"Then it probably was an accident." she giggled before adding some soap to my hair.

"She said she thought my head was on fire, what was that all about?"

"Brittany isn't what you'd can the smartest crayon in the box. You're hair being red probably confused her. She did the same thing to Ms. Pillsbury…on multiple occasions."

"Oh, that just sounds…fantastic."

"You'll get used to it."

"Ok, that's two people I've heard that from today. Are you seriously telling me I'm gonna have to get used to…this? Really?"

With a knowing grin Mercedes replied, "Yep….try the hand dryer on your hair. Who was the other person you heard it from?"

"Kurt Hummel," At that moment I bending over in front of the hand dryer. If anyone walked in, it'd definitely be a strange sight to see.

"Aw, Kurt didn't tell me he met you." I barely heard Mercedes's voice say over the sound of the dryer.

"Should he have? I mean I met you first….Hot!" the damn machine was going to make me bald!

"Move your head around dummy!"

I knew that….

When my hair was finally dry Mercedes lent me her comb and we walked into the hallway just as the bell rang. "Where are you going?"

"Ummm…study hall, with Mrs. Jefferson."

"_Movin' on up, to the east side._"

Well I didn't expect that, "Damn Mercedes, where'd that come from?"

"Lily, sweetheart, its just one of the many things you're gonna have to get used to. Come on, we have study hall together."

* * *

"What's a glee club?" It was the first thing out of my mouth the moment Mercedes and I joined Kurt in study hall.

"Blasphemer!" Kurt almost shouted, causing the fifty something Mrs. Jefferson to glare in our direction.

"Sorry?"

"Well its…show choir. And amazing, we practically conform our entire lives around it." Mercedes replied reasonably while she rubbed a hyperventilating Kurt's back.

"Oh, that's it?"

"What?" Kurt questioned, "What do you mean that's it? New Directions won regionals, how isn't really the point, and we placed fourth at nationals last year. In the end its our ticket out of here."

"Sorry, its just, that weird tracksuit lady thought I was in…New Directions and she acted like she wanted me murdered."

"Sue Sylvester, she's the coach of the Cheerios." Mercedes explained, forgetting that I had no idea who the Cheerios were.

"Who?"

Kurt seemed all too pleased to enlighten me, "The cheerleading squad, which I'm on… To my dismay Mercedes quit last year. Anyway the squad has basically won more trophies than there are stars in the universe. We won nationals last year via me singing 14 point 5 minutes of Celine Dion….in French I might add…" a moment later he sighed, looked into the distance, and murmured, "We were glorious,"

"Kurt, come back to planet earth please," Mercedes said whilst snapping her fingers in front of his face. He didn't respond, "Ignore him. He'll deflate in a minute. Anyway, she hates Mr. Schuester and the entire glee club because her ridiculously huge funding has been cut because of us."

"So there's no drama then?" sarcasm, how I love you.

With a laugh Mercedes continued, "Definitely no drama….Spill Lil, do you sing?"

Oh no. I couldn't stop it when my voice went up a few octaves, "What?"

"This is study hall you three. That means you should be studying, not talking." Mrs. Jefferson added to her glare from behind her desk. Being typical high school students, we ignored her.

At that very second Mercedes was looking at me, in her eyes was something I didn't like…she couldn't make me do it. "Girl, what are you hiding?"

"Nothing,"

Of course Kurt had to pick that moment to shatter his reverie wall and return to the conversation, "You totally are. A loud screech isn't the normal reaction given when one can't sing."

"You can't make me," Defense seemed like my best option at this point.

"Lily, calm down. Look try outs are at today 3:30, if you can sing you can sure use you, but we're not going to force you to join the club if you don't want to."

Great, guilt. "I really can't, tracksuit gave me detention. I have no idea how long she'll keep me."

"Alright, but we'll keep and eye out for you."

Really, what else can happen to me today?

I'm asking for it aren't I?

* * *

**And that's, it for the moment lol. Reviews are little word boxes of love for all involved, please leave one :).**


	2. Chapter 2

**I probably should've mention that the only thing I own are the characters I invent lol. I would love to own Kurt though, I love that boy :P. **

**Anyway, I'll just come out and say it Lily is pretty much me lol. Sure I've changed a lot but the majority is based off something. For instance I do have severe stage fright, to the point where I literally shake and get tears in my eyes when I'm in front of an audience, alone I'm fine lol, but I still get up there :P.  
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* * *

I think I've left reality only to end up in the Hogwarts trophy room….

"Make sure you get between their tiny golden toes Lou. Even in statue form my Cheerios must avoid athlete's foot of any kind." Sue Sylvester rattled off behind me. Did I mention that she still had absolutely no idea who I was? She was calling me Lou, as in Lucille Ball…as in I Love freakin' Lucy. I guess I should give her some credit for getting the first and last letters right.

While I scrub between gold plated toes that don't even need scrubbing, I think it might be the perfect time to explain why I'm so opposed to singing in public.

See my dad heard me singing once when I was about ten and he thought I was the greatest thing since sliced bread. He bought me all the music from the greatest broadway shows that he knew the names of, this was something he kept up with even after the…incident. Along with the scores, he paid for me to have private lessons with Mrs. McCann this former Broadway Babe that lived a few blocks down from us.

When I say former, I mean really former, the woman was pushing 90 the day I started, but she was cheap and talented so dad figure that it was a win-win. Her one condition was that I had to learn how to play the piano along with my voice lessons, my dad agreed and from that point on I had an hour long music lesson once a week.

I have always been very…unsure of myself. It took three years for me to gain enough courage to perform in one of Mrs. McCann's recitals, she had six other students at the time.

That night I was the last student to perform, I sang and played the piano. While I played Mrs. McCann sat with me and turned the pages on the music because my hands were shaking so badly that once they touched the keys they weren't movin'.

The song was Someone Else's Story from the musical Chess and I nailed it! The moment I finished I stood so I could take my bow etc., but that's when I noticed that Mrs. McCann had her head rested on the piano keys.

She must've died when the applause started….I've been scarred ever since.

My father sold my piano. Mainly due to the fact that I couldn't look at it without screaming, I was just a kid. Though, none of us had the courage to get rid of the musical scores. So they ended up in a labelless box, that I saw last night for the first time in almost four years.

"It 4:30," Sue said, snapping me out of my head and back to my aching hands, "If I didn't have to get to practice I would take you to my house and have you polish the trophies that line the hallways, but for now I'll just have to settle for the dreadful work you've done here."

She didn't wait for a reply, and I hadn't planned on giving one, as she left the room. Once she was gone I got to my feet, grabbed my stuff, and left as fast as I could.

* * *

What the hell am I doing in here?

Why couldn't I just find an unlocked exit before I passed this room of all rooms?

The tryouts were obviously over, I guess not that many people audition for McKinley High's Glee Club…despite their superb record. At 4:40pm the auditorium was still open but completely deserted.

So can someone please explain to me why I'm heading toward the stage right now? I mean even alone it petrifies me, but a few of the over head lights are still on and its like they're saying 'Come Join Us' like its some sort of horror movie.

Maybe aliens have planted a chip in my head or something ….and maybe I'm close to the mother ship and its activated…or something….I hate that saying 'or something'. Can I seriously not come up with any other reason then 'something'?

When I left the trophy room I went for the first exit I could find, but it was chained up like this place was some sort of maximum security prison. I know that once school is out they lock up pretty much all the exits with the exception of the main ones, but come on couldn't that one be open just for me cause I'm awesome?…A little much?

I didn't even know what I was planning to do once I got to where my mind was taking me. It was as if my autopilot switch had been flicked and now I had no control.

"This is absolutely ridiculous," I said to no one, forcing my feet to stop right in front of the stage steps.

I was completely frozen. Only my eyes were able to move and after a bit of confusion they settled on the piano that had been pushed to the part of the stage furthest away from me.

I hadn't touched one in years, not since my dad sold mine to an Italian man who looked like he just walked off the set of Good Fellas.

No one's here. One song couldn't hurt.

And with that I walked up the steps, crossed the stage, and took my seat on the piano bench.

"What am I doing?" I muttered once my fingers landed on the ivory…well it probably wasn't ivory seeing as…you know, hunting elephants is like illegal. Though, maybe the piano was old enough. No, it didn't look that old, its black surface was barely scratched.

Stop thinking of stupid stuff…

Immediately, my fingers started playing the intro to a familiar song.

Isn't it amazing how your brain can remember things? Like the right notes and lyrics to a song, even though you haven't listened to it in ages?

"_Long ago_

_In someone else's lifetime_

_Someone with my name_

_Who looked a lot like me_

_Came to know_

_A man and made a promise_

_He only had to say_

_And that's where she would be_

_Lately_

_Although the feelings run just as deep_

_The promise she made has grown impossible to keep_

_And yet I wish it wasn't so_

_Will he miss me if I go?_

_In a way_

_It's someone else's story_

_I don't see myself_

_As taking part at all_

_Yesterday_

_A girl that I was fond of_

_Finally could see_

_The writing on the wall_

_Sadly_

_She realized she'd left him behind_

_And sadder than that she knew he wouldn't even mind_

_And though there's nothing left to say_

_Would he listen if I stay?_

_It's all very well to say you fool it's now or never_

_I could be choosing_

_No choices whatsoever._

_I could be_

_In someone else's story_

_In someone else's life_

_And he could be in mine_

_I don't see_

_A reason to be lonely_

_I could take my chances_

_Further down the line_

_And if_

_That girl I knew should ask my advice_

_Oh I wouldn't hesitate she needn't ask me twice_

_Go now!_

_I'd tell her that for free_

_Trouble is, the girl is me_

_The story is, the girl is me."_

When my voice finally trailed off and I hit the last note on the piano a quite clapping started at the back of the auditorium from within the shadows. Panicking…I might have screamed like a 5 year old. Along with the screaming I kinda fell off the bench.

No one was supposed to hear that…Seriously.

Whoever was clapping in the back must've run down one of the aisles because pretty soon someone was hopping up on stage.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry, are you okay?" a kind face said as he helped me to my feet.

After about a minute of me staring at him in shocked silence I finally squeaked out "Fine," before I tried to leave the auditorium. I prayed that I would never have to speak to this dark haired boy again.

"Hey, I mean, where are you going?" Oh boy, I had a fair feeling that he wasn't really the sharpest tool in the shed.

"As far away from here as humanly possible…preferably Antarctica," Apparently, I have a weird obsession with Antarctica.

"Why? I mean, I'm sorry if I freaked you out or anything, Mr. Shue sent me in here to lock up because he forgot to and I heard you and I figured you missed the auditions or something….I mean you're good…not Rachel good, but you're good."

I was about halfway down the aisle when he started his little speech, it wasn't hard to guess that he was following me, before I turned to face him. "Look…?"

"Finn,"

Interesting name, "Finn, I don't do this….Not normally. I don't even know why I went up there, just looking at that thing scares me."

With a curious tilt of his head and squint of his eyes he asked, "What thing?"

"…That stage, the piano, this thing in my throat….Just, thank you, alright?... For the compliment, though I have no idea who Rachel is, but can you forget you ever saw me here? Please?"

"Yeah sure, but I still-"

"Thanks Finn, I guess I'll see you around." and with that I pretty much ran out of the auditorium.

* * *

**I love reviews :). If you mention that you actually want to hear me sing and promise not to poke fun, I will oblige :P... **

**I have no idea what I'm getting myself into lol.  
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	3. Chapter 3

**:P, I don't own anything but Lily and her mom...and that's it so far. Though, I was thinking about stealing one Finn Hudson/ Cory Monteith because he was so awesome/adorable last night that it kinda hurt lol.**

* * *

Wonderful!

After finding out that I had received a detention on my first day at a brand new school from a crazy, tracksuit wearing, cheerleading coach, who didn't even know my name and gave me said detention for absolutely no reason whatsoever, my mother has grounded me.

"But I didn't even do anything!" I shouted at her in our small kitchen. She stood at the stove cooking whatever it was we that were having for dinner.

Stirring she spoke softly, "Lily, how can you honestly expect me to believe that? You can't get a detention for nothing,"

"You can if the detention giver is a PSYCHO!…I'll admit that I did show up to class late, but I was covered in slushie! What was I supposed to do?"

"Would you just sit down and shut up for two minutes?" Jamie asked before grabbing the freshly unpacked plates from a nearby cabinet. Despite my outburst, I didn't want to make things worse for myself, so I sat down and shut my mouth. And in two minutes, Jamie followed with two plates full of spaghetti. I hate spaghetti. "Alright, Lily, I'll let you off the hook if, and only if, you don't act like a child when I tell you what I'm going to tell you. Okay?"

Crap, this does not sound good.…but what have I got to lose? "Fine,"

"Good. Now you know its been a few months since your dad left-"

"5...its been 5 months."

Jamie gave me a knowing look before she continued, "Well, I thought that maybe now's the right time to start putting myself out there again. So, on my lunch break the I went to this speed dating thing and I ended up getting paired with this really sweet guy."

Jaw meet table…"Ummm…okay,"

"His name's Ken Tanaka. He's kinda the football coach at your school."

Its official, I'm going to make a sign with flashing lights and set it on fire, **COACHES SUCK!** "Really? I mean you couldn't find anyone else?"

After she finished a forkful of red tinted noodles, she simply replied, "Its not like I know what I'm looking for here. He made me laugh and that's all that I can really ask for right now….The reason why I'm telling you this now is because, we're going out tomorrow night."

Great, he made her laugh….I guess that means I should be happy for her….

* * *

It was cherry flavored this time.

Though I will say that the simple fact that Mercedes didn't bring up me singing means that that Finn guy kept his word. Plus, the fact that I decided to wear my black Hot Topic t-shirt with the image of David Bowie from Labyrinth covering my left boob, meant that the possibility of a stain was greatly lessened. My day was looking slightly brighter than the one before it.

"Lily Matthews I presume," a dark haired girl in a supermini-skirt started once she took her place at the sink next to mine.

"Do I know-"

"You don't, not yet. I'm Rachel Berry, co-captain and resident star of New Directions. I'd shake your hand if you weren't covered in slushie." she replied while she washed her hands.

Okay, is it normal to be meeting people in restrooms like this? "Hi?"

"Finn Hudson is my co-captain and boyfriend. We're adorable, ask anyone. We finally solidified our current status as McKinley High's newest power couple right before our performance at regionals last year." right then she turned to face me, "He told me about you. Finn said that you wanted to keep your talent a secret and that I shouldn't say anything because you seemed embarrassed."

Then why are you speaking these words…out loud…in public, "Then why-"

"I only wanted to tell you that I, for one, completely support your wish to remain artistically inactive. I'm saying this because I'm looking out for the welfare of Glee and the Club's members."

"So why-"

"I've graciously allowed for solos to be split between my fellow female glee members and seeing as this year we've added two more lady members its safe to assume that said solos will be stretched between even more people. It's best for the club as a whole if I'm allowed to sing as much as possible and if you were to join it would just detract from the balanced dynamic of New Directions as a whole. As cap-…co-captain, I really can't let that happen."

How am I supposed to respond to this? "Okay?"

"Great! Now that we've avoided that potential catastrophe, maybe we can hangout sometime. 'K?"

I had an odd feeling that my mouth might have been hanging open as she stared at me with a wide smile waiting for a reply, "Sure?" Single syllables are my friends.

"Fantastic, I'll just take a look at my schedule and I'll get back to you," and she finally left.

"What. The. Hell?"

* * *

"Is this because of the detention? Because I really didn't do anything." I said nervously to one Ms. Pillsbury as I sat in the chair that was placed in front of her desk in her office, which was of course the guidance office.

She smiled, "Oh no, Lily, this has nothing to do with that….I just like to meet with every student here once in a while and since you're new to McKinley I wanted to see how you were adjusting to a new school."

"Its school I guess. There's not really much to say." I mumbled to the floor. My staring at the carpet had nothing to do with nervousness or anything its just…Ms. Pillsbury's eyes kinda freak me out if I'm going to be completely honest.

"Well, have you made any friends?"

I hope Rachel Berry doesn't count, "Mercedes is pretty cool, same with Kurt."

"Good, that's good. Have you thought about joining any extracurricular activates? Both Kurt and Mercedes are in the glee club and I'm sure Mr. Schuester would have no problem letting you join late, seeing as you're new. He's very nice and talented…and cool. He's hip and everything." she said the last part very fast and I watched as her face turned the color of her hair.

Ms. Pillsbury, you don't hide your crush well. "Um, I'm not exactly the extracurricular type." the words come out easily, because they were nothing but truth.

"The students all say that, but then I hear a different tune once they join something. You never know Lily, it might even be fun."

If there was a gun in the office, I would probably shoot myself.

* * *

"Coach Tanaka?" Kurt practically shouted as he, Mercedes, and I talked at my locker.

"Would you keep your voice down? Anyway, how bad is this?" I needed as much info as I could get in order to prepare myself.

"Oh, girl it's bad."

"I wouldn't touch it with a ten foot pole. Has your mother been in any accidents? Or was she just dropped on her head as a child?"

"Kurt stop, you're scarin' the poor thing. Look Lil' there's away we can fix this."

My eyes were wide with terror when we finally walked towards the exit, "How?"

"Ken Tanaka, bumbling adult jock who I think showers with the change of the seasons, hates one William Schuester, because dear William stole the adorable, yet neurotic, Emma Pillsbury from the monsters grip." Kurt rattled off, slinging an arm around my shoulders.

"And how will this help?"

"Mr. Schuester is director of the glee club." Mercedes continued, "Mention the fact that you're glee and Coach Tanaka will probably split."

"You two realize that if I say that I'm in glee club under my mother's roof, with the purpose of getting rid of the guy that makes her laugh, that'll mean I'll have to join."

I'm starting to think that they planned this. I don't know how, but they did….

"Huh, isn't that…convenient."

"Face it girl, we were gonna get ya one way or another."

I really hate them...

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**Reviews are love...and I love all of you...Too creepy?**


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay, I will probably post again today, but it is 2:15am for me right now, so even though I realize the chapters keep getting shorter, we're just going to ignore it for now lol. **

**And now the T rating starts to actually take effect lol.**

* * *

If he's not in here at this very moment I'm gonna back out.

I took a deep breath before I knocked on Mr. Schuester's office door.

I bet you're wondering why I'm actually doing this, especially since its not that hard to imagine me not doing this, but last night changed my mind about the whole glee club thing.

I don't want to join, but if it'll help end this thing with Coach Tanaka, then I'm ready and willing.

* * *

Last night I blared my ipod and cleaned pretty much every inch of the apartment while I waited for my mother to return from her first date with…'Kenny'…eww. Did you know that cleaning is something people do when they're nervous. Its supposed to make you feel more in control…it just makes me sneeze.

I was in my room when I heard my mother calling me from what I suspect was the kitchen, it was only 9:30pm. A grin that made me feel relieved/ terrible lit up my face and I left my room with a loud "That bad huh?" only to walk right into what could've only been Coach Tanaka himself.

"Hello?" he mumbled in a gruff voice.

"Hi,"

"I was just, looking for-"

"Down the hall on the left."

"Thanks," and with that he wondered off in the direction of the bathroom.

The first words out of my mother's mouth were, "Don't freak out, he's just here for coffee"

"Yeah, I'm sure that's what they all say. Are you sure you shouldn't wait in front of the bathroom door for Kenny? You can make sure he doesn't steal anything-" the sound of a flushing toilet along with my mother's look of death ended my rant.

After that the two of them sat in the kitchen, drinking coffee and talking about random stuff like their jobs and family…I'd say Antarctica but strangely enough it was never mentioned. After about an hour of coffee drinking and talking I heard what must've been the awkward goodbye/ shame you're leaving so soon, so I pretty much ran to grab what must've been his coat from the hook by the door. The way I grabbed it must've been weird because something fell out of a pocket and landed quietly on the floor. Bending down to pick whatever it was up I practically had to hold in a scream of revulsion.

What is the last thing you want to think about when it comes to your parents and the way you came into existence….Yeah, sex. Lets just say that even though it was only their first date, dear Kenny came prepared.

I was still on the floor when the sound of walking caught my attention causing me to straighten up with Coach Tanaka's coat it my left hand and his condom in my right. Not even registering what I was doing, I shoved the condom in my pocket.

There my grossed out/ shock muffled ears I pretty much heard this,

"I had a good time tonight blah blah blah,"

"Blah me too blah blah,"

And then they kissed…right in front of me. It lasted about five seconds until I threw the coat between them and pretty much shouted.

"Mom, I joined glee club,"

* * *

And that's how I ended up here, in front of Mr. Schuester's office, during lunch, waiting for him to answer the do-

"Can I help you?" a male voice behind me greeted. The moment I turned around I couldn't help but think that if this was Mr. Schuester glee club couldn't be that bad…the guy was gorgeous.

I stupidly mumbled, "Mr. Schuester?" as I followed him into what could only be his office.

"Yep, that would be me." he replied with an easy grin as he opened a bottle of water and leaned against his desk.

Keep your eyes on his face Lily, "Well, ah, my name's Lily Matthews. I'm not in any of your classes or anything and I'm new. I haven't seen you around or anything-" I'm rambling, looking at his face isn't helping…but its so pretty…floor, look at the floor.

"Lily? Just tell me what you need,"

"Iwaswonderingif Icouldauditionfor NewDirections," it came out as a quick but quite mumble and judging by Mr. Schuester's look of amused confusion, he had no idea what I just said.

"I know I teach a foreign language, but I'm not sure if I know that one,"

"I was wondering if I could audition for the glee club. I know its late and everything-"

"Don't worry about it, we can use anyone whose willing…and at least slightly talented. Tell you what, prepare something for tomorrow and we'll see what you got. Alright?"

"Yeah, yes." I didn't know if I was relieved or scared shitless, "Thank you,"

I backed out of the room as fast as I could without falling over and went straight to the cafeteria.

I had an audition, now I just needed to pick something to sing.

"I'm gonna be honest, I never wanted to see anything like this."

"I don't think I'm going to be able to like at him ever again without the logo flashing in my brain."

Kurt and Mercedes were currently in my bedroom staring at the thing that was going to scar us for the rest of our lives.

"Why did you keep it?" Mercedes asked once again. We all knew it wasn't the object itself that was freaking us out, but who it belonged too.

"I don't know, collateral? But can we please focus?"

"Fine, but you have damaged me mentally. I'm not sure why I'm helping you with this." Kurt stated as he started picking through the ancient book of music, "and I won't be surprised if I catch the plague from this box."

"Seriously? You are not singing something from _The Life_, cuz you are literally the whitest thing I have ever seen."

"_SideShow_…I'm stealing this."

"_Les Mis, Miss Saigon, Jekyll & Hyd_e-"

Mercedes had my precious in her hand "Give me that one," _Jekyll & Hyde_ is my weakness.

"_The Last Five Years, West Side Story, Phantom_,"

"_Dreamgirls_, again too white…."

"_Wicked, Chicago, Mamma Mia_,"

I let out I sigh, I had a feeling they weren't going to stop, "Okay stop,"

"_Gypsy, Avenue Q, My Fair Lady_, this has to be the gayest box in the world."

"You should donate it to the club."

"I will, right after we pick something."

"Why don't you sing something from _Jekyll & Hyde_?" Kurt muttered, tucking the SideShow book under his light blue button down. I'm starting to think that Kurt secretly thinks he's James Bond, I'd say he's more like Clouseau.

"You are holdin' that thing tighter then Quinn Fabray held her baby Beth the day she was born,"

"Who?"

Mercedes continued with a wave of her hand, "Never mind, it obvious you love that show."

I didn't know what to say. Have you ever had something that you wanted so badly but felt in some way it would always be out of reach? That's how I've always seen the part of Lucy in _Jekyll & Hyde_. Linda Eder, the original Lucy on Broadway, was- is a goddess….and if you don't know who she is, go look her up like right now. Even if I actually had the courage to do what I'm doing, I could never sing these song as well as her.

"No, lets just go with something else." I replied sliding the book underneath my bed.

"I don't see how we're supposed to help if we don't even know what you sound like." Kurt said as he played around with the books in front of him.

"Trust me, just pick anything."

* * *

**Okie dokie, please review while ignoring whatever typos are hanging around, I'll fit them eventually lol. Oh and if you don't know what any of those shows are I recommend looking them all up...when you have time lol. **

**edit: fixed one or two things, I've noticed that FF. net took some words out for some weird reason lol.  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Yes, I know, its even shorter by quite a bit, but this is one scene that I didn't really want to pair with anything else and I update fast anyway lol. I don't own ANYTHING, but Lily and every other character I will eventually invent lol. That's not to say that they won't be based on people I know lol. The song in this chapter made a brief appearance on the show but I couldn't think of one to use and I started singing it, so I picked it lol. **

**And I'm rambling...please read lol.**

* * *

I can't do this.

"I can't do this," it came out of my mouth while I was thinking it.

"Yes, you can," Kurt replied in an encouraging tone, he and Mercedes were with me back stage while Mr. Schuester sat alone and patient in the front row.

"No you don't understand, I really can't do this."

"Yes you can and you will, all of us did it." Mercedes said with a small nudge in the direction of Brad who was apparently the mysterious accompanist that randomly appears whenever he's needed. Or so I'm told.

I'm wondering if he's secretly Batman on his days off.

"Guys, I'm not joking-" before I could even finish the sentence, both Kurt and Mercedes pushed me out on to the stage. At this point I would either have to perform or run back to them like a child. Not wanting to damage my pride any further, with the sheet music crinkling in my sweaty hands, I walked toward where Brad sat at the piano, handed him my music and went to stand in the middle of the stage.

I don't know what Schuester was expecting so I didn't say anything. I just gave Brad a nod and he began playing familiar notes.

_What good is sitting alone in your room?_

_Come hear the music play._

_Life is a Cabaret, old chum,_

_Come to the Cabaret._

I started off very quiet and I immediately knew two things, A) this wasn't the best song to pick in order to show off my capabilities, B) I was having serious volume control issues.

_Put down the knitting,_

_The book and the broom._

_Time for a holiday._

_Life is Cabaret, old chum,_

_Come to the Cabaret._

_Come taste the wine,_

_Come hear the band._

_Come blow your horn,_

_Start celebrating;_

_Right this way,_

_Your table's waiting_

Should I be dancing or something. I mean most people would move around when they perform a song like this…right?

…My feet refused to move, so I settled for spirit fingers.

_No use permitting_

_some prophet of doom_

_To wipe every smile away._

_Come hear the music play._

_Life is a Cabaret, old chum,_

_Come to the Cabaret!_

By this time I had loosened up a bit, my feet became movable and so did my legs in general. I began walking around an getting slightly more into character.

_I used to have a girlfriend_

_known as Elsie_

_With whom I shared_

_Four sordid rooms in Chelsea_

_She wasn't what you'd call_

_A blushing flower..._

_As a matter of fact_

_She rented by the hour._

_The day she died the neighbors_

_came to snicker:_

_"Well, thats what comes_

_from to much pills and liquor."_

God this song was-is completely inappropriate. I wished I could tell if Schuester felt the same or not. When I finally gathered up enough courage to look at him, it threw me completely off because I really couldn't tell what he was thinking.

Oh God, my throat is starting to cut off my air supply.

Think of the audience naked.

DO NOT THINK OF THE AUDIENCE NAKED!

My face blushed and my body shook as I once again stood shock still gripping the mike like it contained oxygen.

_But when I saw her laid out like a Queen_

_She was the happiest...corpse..._

_I'd ever seen._

AIR!

I gasped, audibly.

By this point I pretty much knew that I had screwed everything up beyond repair, so I loosened up once more, because hey things really couldn't get worse.

_I think of Elsie to this very day._

_I'd remember how'd she turn to me and say:_

_"What good is sitting alone in your room?_

_Come hear the music play._

_Life is a Cabaret, old chum,_

_Come to the Cabaret."_

_And as for me,_

_I made up my mind back in Chelsea,_

_When I go, I'm going like Elsie._

_Start by admitting_

_From cradle to tomb_

_Isn't that long a stay._

_Life is a Cabaret, old chum,_

_Only a Cabaret, old chum,_

_And I love a Cabaret!_

The moment I finished the music cut out and I breathed a sigh of relief, and promptly tripped over my own feet while Kurt and Mercedes clapped their asses off.

"Ow," I said to the floor whilst pushing myself back into a standing position and ignoring the groans from the people behind the curtain...and what was apparently Brad's laughter.

Once there I turned to look at Mr. Schuester and "Sorry, to waste your time," slipped out of my mouth before I could stop myself.

"She's an idiot," Kurt called out for us all to hear.

"You didn't waste it." Mr. Schuester started, approaching the stage, "You're rough,"

"Really rough like sand paper," I added.

He smiled, but other than that he ignored my words, "But its there."

And for a minute no one spoke, "Does that mean I'm in?"

"You're in. Just try to leave out the falling part."

"I-I will,"

"Fantastic, seeing as you missed the last two practices and today's was canceled, I'll let you know that this week's assignment is Billy Joel. If you're up to performing on Friday, that's great, but I won't make you if you're not up to it yet."

Billy Joel…awesome and totally doable, "I think I might be able to come up with something,"

"Good, but still no pressure. So, I'll see you at practice tomorrow. I'm really looking forward to seeing what we can get out of you, Lily Matthews."

I let out a small laugh before I yelled a quick "Thank you," at his retreating form.

"Lil' I think I might have to knock you back on your face. Why did you have to get me all worried like you couldn't sing when you clearly can?" Mercedes stated as we walked out of the auditorium.

"Massive stage fright?" it wasn't really an excuse, but saying it out loud made it sound like one.

"Well, that's obvious, but not needed. Like Shue said, its there, we just need to make you a diamond. Can we ask why exactly you have developed such fear of the stage?"

I'm starting to think that a Mad Scientist performed an experiment and Heckle & Jekyll were the by product.

"Umm, do you really want to know?"

"Yes," they both answered in unison, giving even more credence to my theory.

"The last time I sang on stage…someone died."

Like I knew it would, identical looks of fear crossed their faces.

Cue thoughts of a vacation to Antarctica. I hear the killer whales are pleasant this time of year.

* * *

**I'm gonna try to say this in a non creepy way, I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE...please review :P.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Haha, its longer lol. I don't own anything except my characters, but if the creators of Glee wanted to give me Puck as a present I wouldn't mind :P.**

**I didn't include the song lyrics only for the simple fact that this chapter would have been crazy long if I did and most of the songs are pretty well known anyway. **

**I will also admit that, Regan is based off of a friend...she knows who she is lol.**

* * *

"We're just going to ignore the five random newbies sitting around the room for the moment because other than the fact that that one obviously has a thing for the quarterback, I know nothing about them. So, from what you've told us, you've met our pain in the ass but talented star Rachel Berry, who's currently dating Finn Hudson, who apparently you've also met. Don't tell anyone, but the rest of the club has been betting on how long they'll last. Mercedes and I are already out of the running."

"Finn's also Kurt's step brother,"

"I refuse to acknowledge that term,"

"Should I be writing this all down or something?"

It was the next day and my first practice with New Directions. Kurt and Mercedes were filling me in on each member of the club.

"No, I think you're good," Mercedes said with a laugh.

"Anyway, Finn used to date Quinn Fabray, former cheerleading captain and president of the celibacy club, who cheated on him with Noah Puckermann, who's basically a man whore. Well, she ended up pregnant and blamed it on poor Finn when it was Puck's baby."

"Quinn is my girl. She used to live with me when her parents kicked her out, but then they got divorced and her mom let her move back in. With the whole lyin' to Finn thing, she was just a confused and she went with the guy that she thought would be the best baby daddy. It could happen to any of us."

"There was this huge blow up and everything, Finn was ticked for a while, but he got over it."

"Quinn went into labor right after she performed at regionals and I was there when she gave birth to little Beth, who was adopted by Rachel's biological mother Shelby who was the former director of Vocal Adrenaline. They're this huge show choir that basically kicked our asses, but she quit before the big secret came out."

"I doubt she even knew about it, that Jesse St. James was one deliciously evil bastard child of Satan."

I'm totally confused, "What was the big secret?"

Kurt grinned, "The fact that every member of Vocal Adrenaline, except for like three people, were taking steroids in order to enhance their performance."

You have got to be- "Seriously?"

"Yep, they were immediately disqualified and then someone on Aural Intensity let it leak that they were tipped off about the judges," Mercedes supplied, "Basically, we were the only team at regionals that didn't cheat and upon review by this board of directors or whatever, we were allowed to move up to nationals, where we totally kicked butt-"

"But that's a tale for another day. To continue, Quinn and Puck broke up over the summer, no one knows why but them. Mike & Matt barely speak and they joined after the football team's winning performance of Single Ladies during one of our games, which Puck and Finn also performed."

"You're on the football team too? Jesus, is their anything you don't do?"

"I'm a man of many talents, a jack of all trades-"

"There's plenty he doesn't do, but to just this over and done with before Shue shows up, Santana and Brittany joined to be spies for Sue Sylvester when she was hell bent on bringin' down the club, Quinn too before everyone found out she was preggers, but it turned out that they liked being in glee and they stopped bein' all 007. Actually, they're pretty cool once you get to know them."

"What about those two?" I whispered while pointing to a cute couple, an Asian Goth girl and a cute boy in a wheel chair.

"Tina and Artie, they're exactly interconnected like everyone else, but they are totally OTP. Aren't they adorable?"

"Yeah?"

"You do that realize we can hear you, right?" Artie commented as he wheeled his chair into the front row.

"I'm not 7...I'm 17," Brittany mumbled from the back row. "What's a 'double ho'? How can you be a ho more than once?"

"Oh, not ho, Brittany. And where do you two get off-"

"Hey gang! Sorry about being late and everything. There was a… very important meeting." he cleared his throat nervously before continuing, "Anyway, who wants to perform?"

Being that this was high school, almost no one raised their hand.

Hey, don't look at me. I can't exactly get a decent performance together in less then a day.

Rachel basically had her hand in the air before Mr. Schuester even said anything, "I'll go first Mr. Shue."

"Alright, go a head Rachel." he replied with the air of having done so many times.

So she did, with Brad once again on the keys and the band on their various instruments.

I think I'm a little scared of quiet Brad with those laughing eyes behind inconspicuous wire rims.

"I have chosen," she started to announce to the collective slumping on her audience, "Mr. Joel's 'Leave a Tender Moment Alone'. Mr. Joel wouldn't have been my first choice for our first assignment of the year, but I'm making due with the assignment provided."

Once finished the music started right on cue, and the moment Rachel opened her mouth I knew why everyone said that I wasn't as good as Rachel….Its because no one is as good as Rachel.

She's freakishly good, like sold her soul good…sadly, it probably wouldn't surprise me at this point.

Of course it was noticeable that she not only tweaked the arrangement but also the lyrics to suit a female singer…which I pretty much assumed was what every other girl would also do.

But she sang with feeling behind her words and every once in a while she looked straight at Finn and I got the strange feeling that I had walked into some kind of weird made for TV musical.

Why is her hair blowing in the non existent wind?

When she finished there was clapping, which I didn't partake in because of the feeling of panic welling inside of me.

How can I even compare to that?

"Fantastic," Shue called while Rachel and Finn shared a quick kiss before he volunteered.

Again Brad seemed to know the music needed before Finn even announced it.

"I'll be singing 'Honestly'," he said with a grin before Brad hit the first note from what was apparently the right sheet of music.

Yep, Brad seriously freaks me out….I pray to God he isn't secretly reading my mind. I had a feeling if he was, he'd sick his band minions on me.

And like he was when he helped me up in the auditorium, Finn was adorable and he had a nice rockish voice that would obviously benefit from a bit more training, but it was raw and sweet.

Just like Rachel did, he flashed her lovey looks. This was apparently a typical occurrence for the two because no one else seemed to take notice.

When he finished the next person up surprised me…it was Santana.

"Piano guy," she commanded, obviously used to the action, and Brad started playing.

"Only the Good Die Young…" I whispered with a grin of my own as Santana began singing.

I'm regretting the decision every time one of the girls open their mouths. They're all better than me…by like, ocean lengths.

How long is that exactly?

"It suits her," Kurt said with a fun having grin of his own.

It truly did.

Next up was,

"I'm not announcing myself like a weirdo," Puck muttered before giving a nod to the pianist, immediately 'Laura' started playing.

And damn, not only was he gorgeous, on the level of Mr. Shue gorgeous shaved head and all, but the boy had pipes…and quite obviously a lot of pent up emotion stemming from his break up with the blonde sitting directly behind me.

I planned on dropping to the floor if he decided to throw anything in my direction.

He finished, sat down, and the room was silent for about thirty seconds before Mr. Shue…yes if you haven't noticed I call him that now, got to his feet and waited for the next contestant on…the price is right…?

It was funnier in my head.

"Timothy, wow first new member to volunteer. Takes guts, lets see what you got."

Sandy haired, lanky, and bespectacled Timothy stepped in front of the room exactly where the rest of the performers stood as they sang. He straighten his polo and mumbled…

"What did he say?" Mercedes said leaning over me to get to Kurt.

"I think he said-"

"Uptown Girl," the three of us said in unison when the notes flew from the piano.

He was good too, obviously a tenor. He sounded a lot like a weird mix between Meat Loaf and Adam Levine and Art Garfunkel.

Yeah, try to figure that one out.

Just like there was for everyone else, we let out an applause when he finished and Mercedes got to her feet.

"Brad you know what I'm lookin' for," she said with confidence as Brad placed the sheet music of the piano's stand, the band members following suit exactly like there was a weird telepathic connection between them and their alien leader.

'Big Shot' started playing and like I knew she would, Mercedes knocked it out of the park with her own style. She walked back and took her seat next to me, obviously knowing that she had kicked ass, while the applause for her roared.

To my surprise her performance didn't make the monster growing in my stomach any bigger only because of the simple fact that she was my friend.

"Well, I wouldn't want to follow that, but we have time for two more people to perform. So," Mr. Shue said with a clap of his hands, "Who's willing to take the plunge?"

"I'll go I guess," one of my fellow new female's mumbled from the back, drawing the eyes of everyone in the room, including Finn.

"Ah, Mr. Shue, can I…umm, be excused. I have to use the ah men's room." Finn asked with a scared edge to his voice.

Mr. Shue looked at his student curiously before saying, "Sure Finn, if you have to-" as Finn practically ran out of the room as the girl took her place at the front. She didn't look quite as happy as she did a minute ago, but she did sing 'You May Be Right,' well enough and in character…which was strange.

Though, that could be because bits and pieces of it definitely applied to her. Especially the 'May Be Crazy' part. While she sang I noticed that Finn's head kept appearing in the doorway.

"Nice job, Regan." Shue said with an encouraging smile as both Regan and Finn took their seats.

"That was weird," I muttered, only Kurt heard me.

"I agree, she isn't hiding her stalker tendencies very well."

Once they were settled, Tina took the place of Regan and without a word Brad started playing 'It's Still Rock and Roll to Me,"

She sang, she danced, and she rocked out like it was going out of style and judging by her clothes and attitude she had some experience with the lyrics.

A clear "Wow," came out of my mouth when she finished.

"Girl doesn't get enough solos," Mercedes said bringing her hands together.

"Awesome Tina. Alright, the rest of you will be on the chopping block tomorrow." Mr. Shue concluded as everyone got to their feet, "Lily, can you stay for a second?"

Oh God, "Sure,"

I won't even begin to pretend that I didn't see Rachel glare at me. I guess we won't be having that get together after all.

The moment everyone else left the room Mr. Shue spoke, "So Coach Tanaka spoke to me earlier and he gave me the distinct impression that you might only be here for the simple purpose of ending whatever personal thing that he has going on with your mother."

Shit, "That's not-"

"Honestly, he made it seem like I somehow had a hand in this decision of yours, which I don't really appreciate, but seeing as I didn't it doesn't really bother me. I just need to know one thing,"

"Which is?"

"If you're planning on quitting sometime down the road. I don't want to piece together anything for you're going to be gone in a month." he didn't sound mad or upset or for that matter annoyed, which made me feel a hell of a lot worse.

"I'm not gonna lie to you Mr. Shue, but I'm not going to tell you that it was the only reason I joined either," and to be completely honest, it wasn't. My crazy ramblings might have made it seem that way, but its honestly not the case.

I have fun singing and even if I have tons of stage fright and people are better than me and old people die during my performances, I still have fun singing…which sounds absolutely terrible when I put it into words.

"Does that mean you don't plan on quitting in the near future?"

"I don't plan on quitting in the near future, but I don't know what exactly I can contribute here." I replied with a laugh, "Everyone else its clearly a million times better than me."

"Its not true. Confidence can go along way. You'll get there, seeing as you're staying, we'll all help to get you there. Now go on, go home practice. I look forward to tomorrow's performance. Have you picked a song?"

I smiled, "I'm workin' on it."

* * *

**I need help, what Billy Joel song do you guys think Kurt would sing? It can't be any of the ones used or Piano Man and Scenes From and Italian Resturant, because I already know who's singing those.**

**Please leave your answer in a nice review...please...pretty please?**


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm not really one to normally write angst, but idk I think this chapter might be a little angsty? I guess you guys'll tell me lol. **

**I don't own anything, other than the characters I have invented. Kendall is also based off a friend, I think she'll like the song choice lol. **

* * *

When I got home the day after my audition, the first thing I did was break open my 'Ireland' piggy bank that my dad left in my possession. It was this secret thing that we kept from my mother, our planned trip to Ireland when I turned 18. Without counting it I knew I had at least $1000 dollars in bills and change that I had collected on my own since I was three.

I put $200 in my purse and hid the rest. My Ethan Hunt mission, to buy a keyboard in order to practice. Besides, there was no way in hell I was letting the telepathic piano player accompany me. I'd play for myself. The plus of this plan of action was that I wouldn't have to stare at my fellow glee club members.

This mission of mine turned out to be totally possible, I was able to purchase a keyboard at the fabulous Wal-Mart for under $150.

The next thing I did, was look up a bunch of Billy Joel songs. Then I bought the sheet music online and printed it out. I was completely set and I had been practicing for hours on end. I can proudly state that I pretty much had 'Piano Man' down, which is totally awesome seeing as I had never played it and not including the auditorium thing, I hadn't touched one for 4 years.

The moment I walked in the door after practice, my plan went completely out the window.

"What are you doing home?" I asked my mother, who happened to be watching Oprah. The Twilight cast was on…again. I was very happy that she didn't glue my eyes open and force me to watch it with her. Normally she didn't get home until sometime around five.

"Came home sick," she said with a sniffle, "A letter came for you from New York,"

"New York…do I know anyone in New York?"

"Don't know," she replied as I wandered into the kitchen and grabbed said letter before heading to my bedroom.

_Dear Petal, _

Oh shit….

_I bet you're wondering why I haven't written to you, or called, or contacted you in anyway since I left._

_The only explanation I can give you is, I'm an asshole and I truly never deserved a kid like you. I basically had to bribe your Aunt Jessie to give me your new address seeing as apparently you and your mom moved…to Lima, Ohio. _

_I hope you can forgive me enough to write me back…tell me how you've been, what Lima is like. Have you made any new friends yet? You were always a shy kid and with what happened…_

_Just, please sweetie have pity on your dad. Who got his comeuppance when the woman he stupidly dropped his wife and daughter for maxed out his credit cards and left him for a baker on West 45th__ Street. _

Underneath his plea he wrote his New York address and his phone number.

_I miss you petal._

_Love, Dad_

Well, so much for whale whisky and Eskimo children.

* * *

"Lil', you ok?" Mercedes questioned the moment I walked into trig, my eyes redder than the mornings after I watch Schindler's List.

"Yeah, fine" I mumbled as I took my seat only to be met with a sheet of paper from Mrs. Kaminski.

"Pop quiz, you'll turn the paper over when I tell you," the teacher said while making her rounds.

Again Mercedes looked at me with concern, "Are you sure? Cuz, seriously, you look like you got sprayed in the eyes with an entire can of pepper spray."

"Mercedes, I really don't feel like talking about it," Even if I wanted too what would I say? My dad, who I've damned to the fiery pits of hell, decided he wants to talk to me and once I saw his name on the envelop all I've wanted to do is respond, but I'm to prideful to bother because he doesn't deserve it even though all I've wanted to do for five months is talk to him.

"Alright, but you're still gonna perform right?"

"Eyes on your own papers, you have fifteen minutes and the quiz starts now," Mrs. Kaminski commanded, writing the time on the board as we all flipped our papers.

A unit circle never looked more beautiful.

* * *

"I'll be singing 'Vienna'" Quinn said in a sweet voice, she was the second performer of the practice, one of my fellow newbies went up first. I think his name was Sean, but I wasn't really paying any attention because I was going through a pile of Billy Joel songs.

This is what happens when I cry for hours, forget my music at home, and panic brings me back to tears when I bump into Mr. Shue before fifth period. He was kind and understanding as I explained my freakish/paranoid want to play my own piece, but how I forgot my copy. He sympathetically replied, saying I could find whatever I needed in the choir room and I could even go last.

If we had been in ancient times, I might've kissed his feet…which would've been completely gross.

"Hey, do you…ah need any help?" a male voice muttered quietly. If my one hundred currently swirling emotions weren't enough, I could throw pleasantly surprised on the list, because Puck was the guy standing next to me in front of the shelves.

Though, with Quinn up front I shouldn't have been that surprised.

"Yeah, alright," I wasn't going to begrudge him his ulterior motive to helping me out.

The first thing he did was motion to the 'already gone through' pile on the floor next to me. "I'm guessing I'm not going to find whatever it is you're looking for in there."

"Nope," I replied, throwing another sheet onto the pile and handing him half of the one in my hand.

"It might help if you actually tell me what I'm supposed to be looking for,"

"Piano Man," I whispered to him as I threw another sheet onto the pile

About a minute passed before the applause for Quinn started and the other new girl who had yet to perform, Kendall took her place at the front.

Her words nearly knocked me over.

"I'm, ah, singing 'Piano Man'"

The moment Brad started playing, I just kinda sorta ran out of the room, put my back against a locker, and slid down it until I was sitting on the floor.

"Okay, not that I really care or anything, but can't you just, I don't know, pick something else?" Puck's voice said, I never expected him to follow me.

"I've been practicing that song, I don't know how to play any of the others."

"Have the piano dude play it. That's what the rest of us do."

I just looked at him, with on look on my face that plainly said 'You're annoying the hell out of me, please go away.'

Apparently, he took the hint, because he walked back into the choir room.

Or so I thought, a second later he came back with the stack of Billy Joel sheet music.

"You do realize I just want to wallow in my self pity alone. She's done, you can go back and listen to everyone else, you don't have to help me."

"Red listen, you look so pathetic right now that, despite my lack of caring, I'm not just gonna leave you out here."

"…Awesome, thanks?" I had no idea what he was getting at but I guess he couldn't do me anymore damage at this point.

We sat out there for another five minutes before I found a piece of music that I couldn't put down.

"Thank God, cuz this girl bonding thing was really starting to get on my nerves." he muttered as he helped me to my feet.

"Jeez, I didn't know something as simple as this could bother someone so much. Just a question though, you helping me doesn't have anything to do with your status as a manwhore does it?"

At my question he just shrugged his shoulders and replied with a not to convincing "…No" before we both walked back into the room.

* * *

While we had been out in the hallway Kendall had finished and apparently Brittany followed her with 'Allentown' because apparently her Uncle Tony lives there.

"Very nice Brittany," Mr. Shue said with an amused smile as Artie positioned himself at the front.

"Hit it," he said with a grin to Brad and the familiar intro to 'Scenes from an Italian Restaurant' filled the room. Artie sang the beginning with the right amount of emotion and the moment the song picked up some speed he moved around the room in his chair with a grace that some dancers lacked. I certainly did, he did things with that chair that I could never imagine doing.

As the song slowed down and came to a finish many of us got to our feet and, from my experience, never clapped harder. Soon, Mike began 'We Didn't Start the Fire' and Matt followed with 'Keeping the Faith'.

My nerves were on edge as Nick, one of the new guys, asked Brad if he could play for himself, Brad got to his feet willingly and stood against the wall as Nick played and sang 'She's Always a Woman To Me.'

Good to know that Brad isn't somehow attached to the instrument. Though, I won't put a weird mental connection to the wood and fake ivory passed him.

When he finished Kurt got to his feet and simply said, "I guess that's my cue, I'm ready for my close up Mr. Shue."

Now for my part I had no idea what Kurt would sing or, in fact, what he would actually sound like. Brad returned to his bench and began playing a song that I didn't really know. I think it was called 'And So it Goes' because it was the phrase use the most, and Kurt, unlike the rest of the guys in the room, sang it in a pitch that would be more comfortable for a woman, but I seriously think that he has a higher range than I do.

During the applause for my friend, I got to my feet, moved shakily to the piano, and asked Brad if he won't mind if I also played for myself. Again he got to his feet, I couldn't tell if he was giving me the evil eye or trying to read my mind. So, I just took my place at the piano and looked over the sheet music for a minute before I even thought about starting to play.

I didn't announce myself…I don't even think I could've done it without laughing or choking…either would probably be really bad or possibly life threatening.

Finally, before anyone could tell me to start, I did it on my own. Sure I hit a few bad notes at first, but pretty soon my hands became comfortable which was good because I had the words to worry about.

_Some folks like to get away, take a holiday from the neighborhood_

_Hop a flight to Miami Beach or Hollywood._

_I'm taking a Greyhound on the Hudson River line-_

_I'm in a New York state of mind._

Isn't it weird how you can literally find the perfect song for any and every problem in your life. Its kinda freaky.

_I seen all the movie stars in their fancy cars and their limousines,_

_Been high in the Rockies under the evergreens,_

_But I know what I'm needing and I don't want to waste more time-_

_I'm in a New York state of mind._

_It was so easy living day by day_

_Out of touch with the rhythm and the blues,_

_But now I need a little give and take,_

_The New York Times, the Daily News..._

The piano kept my hands from shaking and staring at the music kept my panic threat level at like….blue? I have no idea how that thing works, what I do know is, red is bad and I wasn't at red level, not yet anyway.

_It comes down to reality-and it's fine with me 'cause I've let it slide,_

_Don't care if it's Chinatown or Riverside,_

_I don't have any reasons, I've left them all behind-_

_I'm in a New York state of mind._

_It was so easy living day by day_

_Out of touch with the rhythm and the blues,_

_But now I need a little give and take,_

_The New York Times, the Daily News..._

_I'm just taking a Greyhound on the Hudson River line-_

_'Cause I'm in a New York state of mind._

Finally, my first performance in front of these people was over and in my personal opinion, I don't think I did half bad and judging by the applause and the look on Mr. Shue's face, the majority of New Directions agreed.

Except for Rachel, who looked shocked and she also kinda looked like she wanted to kill me… which I guess I can take as a compliment, but it still kinda freaked me out a little. Because if there was one person in this room who would commit murder, other than Brad, I had a feeling it would be Rachel Berry.

"Fantastic," Mr. Shue said proudly as I took my seat between a beaming Kurtcedes, which is what I've decided to name my two friends who were probably separated mentally at birth. "Our first week of practice is over and I personally think we're looking good."

On a positive not, which if you couldn't tell is pretty weird for me, I kinda had to agree with him.

I just really didn't want to think about what I would do about my dad or what Mr. Shue would have us perform next week.

* * *

**Aren't you proud, 2 kinda long chapters in a row lol. Thanks to xDollfacex for Kurt's song, I'll be honest and say that its one of the few Billy Joel songs that I've never heard, but its a very pretty song :). I'm glad I got to at least mention that Brittany, Mike, and Matt had solos lol.**

**Reviewz, Iz lovez themz :P.  
**


	8. Chapter 8

**Alright, longest chapter...any ideas on how I could whore myself aka this story out for reviews, my loyal readers? Again, no matter how much I may want too, I don't own anything except my characters.**

* * *

"It didn't work,"

"…It was never a guarantee," Kurt replied during study hall that Monday. If I didn't know any better, I'd say there was fear in his eyes.

"It was never a guarantee?" I said through my teeth, "So I'm not humiliating myself and my mother is still dating the creepy football coach. Do you realize he came over and played house because she's sick? They've only gone on ONE date!"

The craptasticness of the weekend put my father out of my head for the moment, and I would honestly not mind if it stayed that way.

"Quiet," Mrs. Jefferson typically called from her desk.

Mercedes probably thought I was going to kill Kurt because she stepped in with, "Girl, calm down. Look you ain't humiliatin' yourself and you might just have to except the fact that your mom might actually be happy."

"Easy for you to say, your not the one that might actually have to live with him. God forbid they actually get married."

"True, I would not want to in your position. Though it can't be as bad ad sharing a room with him. Finn honestly has no understanding of the terms 'dirty laundry' and 'clothes hamper', its disgusting, but he is absolutely adorable unlike Kenny."

"I hate you,"

"But seriously, you never know, it might even be meant to be." Kurt continued with a grin.

"Look, we're getting you out of that apartment." Mercedes said with a matching grin of her own.

I do not like the sound of this, "…What do you mean?"

"Mercedes and I have decided…you need a girls day out, one which I also attend."

"Do I…have a say in this?"

"You do not, we are taking you shopping cause girl you need something new to cheer you up cuz you are all kinds of depressing."

"But, I don't wan-"

"We don't care, oh and Tina's coming to. And that creepy Regan girl. Rachel didn't really seem too interested in the idea."

Mercedes nodded, "What did you say to her?"

"Wha-I…I might have told her I didn't plan on joining glee club, but that was before I met Kenny, but she really hates me."

"Its because she'll have to share more solos with you than with any of the other new girls." Kurt said with as he fixed a loose strand of hair.

"That would explain it, she really loves her solos, but I thought she knew better by now."

"Old dogs and new tricks don't usually last long."

"Guys, I really hate shopping," I interrupted, I didn't like the idea of talking about Rachel Berry, she might be hiding under a desk or something.

"Oh, you won't hate with the two of us around." Mercedes said with a laugh.

Kurt added, "It's true, we're better than '_What Not to Wear_'"

Why do I not find that idea comforting?

* * *

How did I not know that Puck was in my fifth period class? Aka, World History.

"Because I never show up,"

Well that explains it.

The teacher had yet to enter the class so I guess Puck decided it was the best time to ask me for my notes from last week, "So can I borrow them or not?" he said from his desk that was to the left of mine.

I'm trying to figure out if I think alphabetical order is a blessing or a curse.

"Why didn't you just come to class and take your own notes?"

"Red, did you miss the part where this class is boring?"

"No I didn't Puck, but I sat through the boringness why should it be any different for you?"

"Because I'm me, now will you just give me your notes or not?"

"Fine," I snapped handing them to him, secretly waiting for the inevitable reply of-

"I can't read this, you write like a decapitated chicken."

"Maybe you should've taken your own notes then. Or, I don't know, you can ask the other thirty people in the room,"

"Alright, you knob heads," a familiar voice started when the door slammed shut, "Mr. Norris's mother decided that this passed weekend was a convenient time for her to pass on. If only we all had the luxury of arranging our schedules as such. Anyway, since Principal Figgins has told his wonderful wife of our lurid affair I no longer have my former power of black mail, so I got stuck with you lazy rodents."

God, why do you hate me so much?

"You might be glad to hear that I plan on doing as little work with you people as possible, but if I hear one of you open your mouths after I insert this wonderful little movie that I took from the library, I'm not sure what its about but its not like it really matters, I _will_ torture you in my office, which I recently had sound proofed."

Somehow, I really believed her.

"Any questions?" Coach Sylvester asked as she scanned the room, no one spoke. "Good, jew fro!"

"Yes Coach Sylvester," a boy with crazy frizzy/curly hair in a voice that I hoped, for his sake, wasn't always that high.

"Good to the AV room and grab one of the … you have exactly two minutes," she ordered, pulling a stop watch out of her bag, "Go!" and the boy with the Jewish afro ran out of the room.

And for two whole minutes, there was complete silence in room 113, until the messenger returned. He was out of breath, but with an ancient TV on an equally ancient stand and VCR as his prize. Quickly, he plugged in the equipment and found his seat.

Coach Sylvester looked at the recorded time on her watch and said, "2:05, better luck next time Fro boy. I'll see you after class." before putting the tape in the VCR.

A second later the voice over started to the collective groaning of myself and the rest of the class…except Puck who was strangely non pulsed…until I remembered that Quinn had given birth to his first child…

If you haven't guessed it, we're once again tuning in for "_The Miracle of Life_"

Sylvester took her place behind Norris's desk before pulling a notebook and a sports bottle out of her bag. A second later, she started writing.

In that same second, Puck tossed a piece of paper onto my desk…suddenly the 5th grade came rushing back to me.

_Will you help me with the notes thing or not? Write you answer like a normal human being…please._

I just looked at him before writing:

_One condition._

He replied:

_You have got to be…what?_

I laughed in my head before scribbling:

_What's my first name? _

My question through him for a loop, he obviously didn't know what it was. This time I laughed out loud.

"Lucy," apparently Coach Sylvester was never going to get my name right, "Do you think the disgusting beauty of the birthing process is something to be laughed at?"

"No-No mamma." I _really_ didn't want to be tortured.

"Well that is a pity," and to my shock…she just went back to writing in her notebook.

Sigh of relief.

A moment later, the note was back on my desk:

_Lucy?_

I could definitely have fun with this.

* * *

After the final period of another slushie free day I walked into the choir room where _Duets_ was written clearly across the white board.

"Alright guys, "Mr. Shue started, not wasting a minute, "I was trying to find a song that would be great for our first group number, and not to be cliché, I ended going through some duets and I thought it'd be a great assignment."

"Did you pick a song, Mr. Shue?" Finn questioned from the front row.

" I have, along with the duets you'll be doing, we'll also be working on '_I've Had the Time of My Life_' from _Dirty Dancing_ as our first group number. Before we get to whose singing what, I suggest you guys pick your partners….Remember, whoever's name you pick is your partner, no trading."

Oh, this does not sound good.

First name Mr. Shue puller out of the hat that he placed on the piano, was Artie who then got:

"Matt,"

Interesting.

Second, Santana:

"Kurt,"

Tina, "Quinn,"

Mike, "Brittany,"

Newbie Sean was up next and he got paired with fellow newbie Nick.

Then Finn stepped up to the hat. "Mr. Shue," he whined when he pulled out the tiny piece of paper. The only reply he received was a look, so regretfully he announced "Regan,"

Well it was regretful for him, for Regan it seemed like Christmas came early. She practically screamed from the back row.

This would definitely be interesting.

Mercedes & Kendall.

Rachel & Tim.

Finally, Mr. Shue called my name and I guess it wouldn't exactly take a rocket scientist to figure out who my partner was, but I still had to pick the last paper out of the hat.

"Puck," Jeez, is this guy ever referred to by his first name?

"Okay, everyone is paired up. Now as far as the solo parts go on the group number I've decided to go with Mercedes on the vocals for the second female and during the refrain you and Rachel can do your thing. As for the main verses, it'll be Finn & Rachel, then heading into the Santana & Nick, and finally Puck & Lily…"

What? Why was he picking me for this?

"Before heading back into Finn & Rachel and they'll end it, and of course you all know that everyone will sing the refrain but the mikes on the soloists will enable them to be heard…except for Mercedes who projects so well she doesn't need a mike of her own."

Everyone else laughed, but I was still in shock…oh and Rachel looked a little ticked, "Mr. Shue I don't see why there needs to be so many soloists. The song could really just go with two pairings and Mercedes."

"Valid point Rachel, but seeing as there are more members in the club I figured this would be a good way of giving a few of the new members some exposure."

"But Lily doesn't even want a solo this early, do you Lily?" Rachel asked, her head spinning to me so fast it reminded me of _The Exorcist_.

"I-" I was gonna agree with Rachel and say that I didn't really want it.

"See Mr. Shue," she interrupted, not letting me finish.

Which kinda pissed me off to be completely honest, "I think I can handle it Mr. Shue," I said before Mr. Shue could even ask me anything.

"Glad to hear it Lily." he said beaming and pulling so papers out of his bag, "So, here's the music, look it over for a minute and then we'll start warming up."

We took the music, looked it over, warmed up and in less then ten minutes we were doing our first run through:

**Finn**: _Now I've had the time of my life_

_No I never felt like this before_

_Yes I swear it's the truth _

_and I owe it all to you_

**Rachel:** _'Cause I've had the time of my life_

_and I owe it all to you_

**Finn:** _I've been waiting for so long_

_Now I've finally found someone_

_To stand by me_

**Rachel:** _We saw the writing on the wall_

_As we felt this magical fantasy_

**Nick & Santana:** _Now with passion in our eyes_

_There's no way we could disguise it secretly_

_So we take each other's hand_

_'Cause we seem to understand the urgency_

**Nick:** _just remember_

**Santana:** _You're the one thing_

**Nick:** _I can't get enough of_

**Santana**: _So I'll tell you something_

**Nick & Santana: **_This could be love because_

**Everyone:** _I've had the time of my life_

_No I never felt this way before_

_Yes I swear it's the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

_'Cause I've had the time of my life_

_And I've searched through every open door'_

_Til I found the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

**Me:** _With my body and soul_

_I want you more than you'll ever know_

**Puck:** _So we'll just let it go_

_Don't be afraid to lose control_

**Me:** _Yes I know whats on your mind_

_When you say:_

_"Stay with me tonight."_

**Puck:** _Stay with me_

_And remember_

_You're the one thing_

**Me:** _I can't get enough of_

**Puck:** _So I'll tell you something_

**Me & Puck:** _This could be love because_

**Everyone:** _'Cause I had the time of my life_

_No I've never felt this way before_

_Yes I swear it's the truth_

_And I owe it all to you_

_'Cause I've had the time of my life_

_And I've searched through every open door_

_Till I found the truthand I owe it all to you_

**Finn:** _Now I've had the time of my life_

_No I never felt this way before_

**Rachel:** _Never Felt this way_

**Finn:** _Yes I swear it's the truthand I owe it all to you_

**Finn & Rachel:** _'Cause I had the time of my life_

_And I've searched through every open door_

_Till I've found the truthand I owe it all to you_

**Everyone:** _"cause I've had the time of my life_

_No I've never felt this way before_

_Yes I swear it's the truth_

_And I owe it all to you _

Of course its hard to translate things like Mercedes's amazing background vocals to paper, or the little things Rachel added during the refrain. Or how it sounded when the club sang as a whole. Its really one of those 'you had to be there' kind of things, but overall we kinda kicked ass.

Plus, singing with Puck was definitely going to work….We made beautiful music together.

I couldn't resist.

When practice ended, Puck walked over to me with a grin, "So Red, your place or mine?"

"Mine. I'd rather be on my own turf, I know where all the weapons are." I said with a smile.

Yes, I feel absolutely shameful flirting with Puck like this. I swear to God I do…but, A) its not like anything is EVER going to happen and B) he's really hot.

In conclusion, can you honestly blame me?

Apparently Quinn can, Santana too...If looks could kill… I'm really having bad luck with a lot of the people in this club.

"Alright then, I guess I'll grab my guitar and head over around 7?" he said in a smooth voice with a wink.

"Yeah, that's fine," I would've added a few words if Kurt and Mercedes didn't come up behind me.

"Sorry Puckermann," Kurt said as he and Mercedes started to forcibly drag me in the direction of the exit, " The mall awaits,"

I was yelling my cell number to Puck as they walked/ I was dragged out of the building.

* * *

**Question: do you guys like the lyrics in the chapter or should I not include them?**

**Oh and what do you think Puck & Lily should sing, either Kidd Rock and Sheryl Crow Pictures or Seether & Amy Lee Broken...you pick :P. Though of course if you can think of something better.**

**Also, know of any good female duets? I have 2, but if you guys come up with better ones I'll credit you ;).**

**Reviews please, cuz I'm a reviews whore :P.**


	9. Chapter 9

***Dodges rocks* I'm sorry that this took so long. Business :-/. Please enjoy :).**

* * *

"I am not trying this on,"

"Oh yes you are. Don't make me follow you in there cuz I will." Mercedes said with her finger pointting toward the dressing room.

"But this…I don't wear things like this. Its not-"

"If you even try to say 'you' so help me I will slap you."

"Mercedes has a point. Your clothes are most definitely not you, you just throw them on," Kurt spouted as if he was literally hosting his own TV show, "Take Tina here, her clothes are part of her. You on the other hand just throw stuff on so you're not walking into school naked."

"_Throw_ great choice of words, because I'm contemplating throwing this-this…thing at you, Kurt."

"Its not a 'thing'" he replied with finger quotations, really irritating finger quotations, "Say it with me Lily. It's a 'dress',"

"She'll probably make it into a noose in a second," Tina giggled from behind Kurt with a smile.

"I like you," I said with a laugh. And I did, it seemed that our minds worked exactly the same way.

"Why thank you…?" she mumbled curiously before walking through the racks of clothes.

"Kurt what's Finn's favorite color?" Regan asked as she came back to the rest of us was five shirts in her hand, all the same but different colors.

Thinking quickly Kurt replied "…He's color blind,"

Suddenly, yet true to form, Regan gasped, "He's blind?", dropping all her shirts to the floor.

"No-no, he just can't see colors," Kurt continued while Mercedes and I just stared between him and Regan, like we were at a tennis match.

"Has he seen a doctor? My uncle is a gynecologist, maybe he could help."

"No he's okay with it…" Kurt muttered with a slightly frightened nod, "….So…ah just wear whatever you want, okay?"

"Yeah, ok….I just wish there was more I could do for him."

"He'll live, "Mercedes said with a smile. In that moment, sensing that I was distracted, she basically pushed me into an open changing room and shut the door. "Now you aren't coming out of there until you try the damn dress on,"

Rather then argue and literally get stuck in the changing room until close, I just slipped the dress over my head. "Alright, Mercedes, its on you can open the friggin' door."

And she did.

Immediately Kurt started, "Why Miss Lily, look at you-"

"Continue to quote _Wicked_, and I _will_ kill you." I growled before stepping in front of the closest mirror. I had to admit, that it didn't look bad. It was short sleeved, lavender and baby blue, with a high waist and lace trim that went down to my knee. I was glad that I had been forced to try it on, despite the smug look on Kurt's face… but then I looked at the price tag.

$80? I could make the damn thing for less, "I can't afford this," and I couldn't. I only bought the keyboard because it was a necessity. Besides, I only had $50 in my purse.

"And that's why we are such great human beings, right Mercedes?"

"Definitely, see you are not buying that." she continued, coming to stand next to me.

"I'm not?"

"Nope, we are." she finished with a grin.

My head shook so hard I thought it was going to fall off, "No, I can't let you-"

"Sweetheart, we are bored and spoiled," Kurt sighed, "And we need to get you a Welcome gift anyway,"

"No one ever gets a 'Welcome' for transferring to a new school,"

"Well you're gettin' one, Lil'. Now please go get dressed, before that girl over there gets us kicked out because of her crazy eyes."

And with that Mercedes pushed me back into the dressing room.

* * *

Five minutes later the five of us left … the expensive store with the random name that I never even bothered to learn. Once we were outside of the store, I replied to a text that Puck had sent me.

The guy needed to know where I lived after all.

"I can't believe you guys did that," I muttered as I closed my phone. I couldn't help it, I felt embarrassed by their generosity.

"Girl, look, we like you. You fit in with us and that dress looked great on you. When it comes down to it, we just couldn't resist." Mercedes said with a smile.

Sensing a cue, Kurt cut in, "And speaking of 'couldn't resist'. What exactly is going on between you and Noah Puckerman?"

I knew it was going to come up eventually, "Nothing. I'm not sure he even knows my name."

"Lil', I like the boy and all, I mean we dated for a little bit and he is gorgeous, but the fact that he doesn't know your name isn't exactly something he'll see as a problem."

"She's telling you the truth. Puck's a smooth talker and an experienced equal opportunity man whore," Tina added.

"Are you guys…worried about me?" I couldn't help but giggle, "Look, I have a small bit of experience…okay, I don't have any experience with man whores, but I have experience with crazy guys," and I did. I kid you not, I had this one boyfriend who threatened to kill my friend's cats _Godfather_ style and put the heads in her bed. All because she told me he was cheating on me. And then their was the guy who brought a box cutter on our date and then started playing with it during desert. He wanted me to play that game where you stabbed the blade between your fingers as fast as you could...I'm not sure either of them could've been dumped faster, " I think I can handle Puck,"

"We're more worried about you _wanting_ to handle Puck." Kurt said slyly.

"You perv!" I screeched, hitting him playfully.

"Oooooo," Regan sighed, causing us all to look at her. Her eyes were locked on Gertrude Hawk, " I'm gonna go buy Finn some chocolate….I'll give it to him after we practice, cuz if I give it to him before he'll have trouble singing…." And with that she walked off and into Gertrude Hawk.

"Guys, she's like… really weird." Tina commented, " I mean know I'm a little weird…but she's like a superhero of weirdness."

"I'm honestly starting to fear for Finn's life," I said, my eyes huge as they followed Regan. "And I really don't even know the guy,"

"I wonder what will happen to the poor thing when Rachel finds out," Mercedes said with a sigh.

"She'll be torn to pieces," Tina muttered, her voice level and serious, her head shaking regretfully.

I wonder…if Rachel is really as murderous as they say…what's she gonna do to me?

As we all stared into Gertrude Hawk, dramatically I might add, a voice called to us, "Hey Gleeks!"

And a second later we were all covered with several different flavors of slushie. I guess the jocks all hang out at the mall too.

* * *

The moment I got home, I jumped in the shower. I had too, I was all gross and sticky. Of course, Puck was going to show up soon, but I still held the vague hope that he wouldn't show up until I was ready, cause in movie world the girl looks fantastic when the hot guy shows up.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" fell out of my mouth the moment I opened my bedroom door. Wet hair, bright pink robe and all.

"Relax, Red. Your mom told me I could chill in here until you were ready…. Cute stuffed animals by the way." he said with a sly grin from my bed that he decided to lay on…while playing with Hopsy, my stuffed frog. What appeared to be his guitar case lay on the floor.

"Out,"

"What's the rush?"

"Funny, but I'm not getting dressed with you in here."

"Come on, I'll cover my eyes and everything." he continued as I dragged him to his feet and pushed him out of my room with all my might.

With the door shut and locked, I got dressed as fast as I could. Presentable, in a T-Shirt and sweat pants, I opened the door and found Puck right where I left him, "Now you can come in,"

He looked me up and down before he actually walked back into my room, "So, have you picked what we're performing yet?" he questioned as he plopped on my bed.

He looked way too comfortable there for my liking...or for my unliking...god, he's hot!

"What? I thought we would, ya know, do that together." I replied as I pushed his feet over to make room for myself.

"Seriously?" he seemed slightly shocked, "Really Red? If you haven't noticed, I'm not the pure bred glee type. I have no idea what we should sing."

I could feel my eyebrows reaching for my oh so low ceiling, "Well, how am I supposed to know?"

"I don't know, you're a chick and everything…pick something."

Oh that sounds encouraging. Thank God I'm brilliant, "Alright, we're both here, we'll figure something out." For ideas, I turned on my laptop (yes I have a laptop…it hasn't just appeared, this is the only time I've had to mention it) and immediately went to my itunes library.

"You do realize that I don't actually give a shit what you pick right?"

I sighed, "Fine, I just need some information."

"Is this some kind of survey-" he stopped when I shot him a look, "Alright, what d'you need to know?"

"What's your voice part?"

"…Um, dude?"

Jeez, "High, low, or in between?"

"I think Shue mentioned something…like baritone? Whatever that is,"

"No that's good, you're in between then. Okay, do you have a specific style that you feel comfortable with?"

"I'm pretty much cool with everything. Just not show tunes… cuz, you know, that's kinda gay."

Wonderful, that cancel's out the majority of my ideas, "Umm…okay."

While I searched itunes and the internet, Puck apparently decided that he wanted to sit up and have a heart to heart, "Why were you all crazy the other day?"

A blunt heart to heart, "None of your business,"

"You can tell me if you want, I won't like tell anyone."

"Okay, what about Pictures by Kidd Rock and Sheryl Crow? Or maybe Broken by Seether and Amy Lee?" Ignoring his questions seemed like the best option open to me at the moment.

"Broken…can you sing that? You know, well."

I laughed, "What do you mean?"

"Amy Lee's like a badass…"

"And?"

"You're you."

"Thanks. I don't think I'll have any trouble, but if you want to do something else-" I started to click out of the lyrics screen.

"No, if you can do it, fine." he muttered, I couldn't tell if he felt bad or if he just wanted to get this over with.

"Your sheer confidence in me is shocking." I mumbled while searching for a site that sold printable sheet music. I wasn't oblivious to his eyes boring into my back. Once I bought the music and hit print, I snapped, "Seriously, what the hell?"

"What?"

"Could you quit the creepy stalker staring?"

"I wasn't-"

"Yes, you were!"

"So what, are you psychic or something?"

"I-" I didn't have a reply, so I did the next best thing…I started laughing. "This is so weird."

"What?" it seemed to be the word of the night.

"I don't know, you bring all lifetime and asking about my feelings."

"What can I say? You've caught my interest Red."

I couldn't take it anymore, "My name is Lily, not one of the colors of the rainbow." I said with another laugh plus a blush.

"So," he replied with a shrug.

"So?"

"Its not like you call me Noah. Why should you be special?"

"Oh, that's gentlemanly of you. You didn't even know my name until two seconds ago, and now you know it and you're just not gonna use it."

"Can we just practice since your being weird?" he said

"Fine, grab the music and look it over. I'm gonna go get a water." I sighed while getting to my feet, "You want one?"

"Sure, seeing as I'm guessing you mom won't give me a beer," Thank God I know what sarcasm is or I might've thought he was being serious.

"Cute," and I was out the and walking down the hallway. Not even a minute passed before my mom came into the kitchen.

And Jamie had a huge grin across her face, "He's like, really hot,"

While juggling the bottles and a bag of chips I whispered, "Are you twelve? Why did you let him wait in my room? That's just really… unmotherly."

"Please, I wouldn't let him in there if I thought he was gonna go rummaging through your underwear drawer. He's not the type."

Remind me to check for missing…articles of clothing when he leaves.

"Besides, you haven't dated anyone since…Charles-"

"Carl," that was box cutter boy. I still get creeped out when I think of him. "And this isn't a date, its practice."

"So, what, you giggling is a glee requirement? Actually, it'd make sense."

"Funny…yeah." I said nodding my head before adding, "Hey mom, when's Kenny comin' over?"

She took the hint, "Go back to practice."

"Don't mind if I do."

Less then a minute later I was back in my room and I found Puck looking at a piece of paper…that wasn't sheet music. How could I be so stupid? I must've left the letter out in the open...Though, I'm not sure that I can rule out the idea that Puck stumbled upon it while going through my stuff.

"That's private!" I said dropping the refreshments as I tried to grab it out of his hand. I ended up tackling him onto my bed. It'd be kinda hot, if I wasn't so pissed.

"Shit. Here, get the hell off me," he mumbled handing me back the letter.

A second later we were both presentable and sitting in silence.

Puck broke it, "Look-"

"Please leave," my throat barely let the words escape. I was gonna cry...Shit, I was gonna end up crying in front of this...god, I don't even know what to call him.

"Would you listen?" he said, his voice oddly serious. Freakishly understanding.

I did not want to have the, 'whose horse is better?'…. which, in this instance, would be the 'whose dad is worse?' competition with Noah Puckerman.

"Do you know how to mind your own business?" I snapped, not caring that I had tears falling out of both eyes.

Again, we were both quiet for a second, until Puck spoke "Fine, I get it….I won't judge you. I'll just forget that I even know your loser dad exists, alright?"

I let out a heavy sigh and wiped my cheeks before turning to him. Oddly enough…I don't know how I knew, but it seemed like he really did understand, "Alright, grab your guitar."

* * *

**How was that? I hope you guys don't hate me for the wait...please review. The blue button is right there...please click it...pretty please?**


	10. Chapter 10

***Dodges rocks and shoes and other things that people can throw at her* Sorry! I know its been like a month and everything, but things came up and then I had no motivation to write, but I got it back today. So enjoy :).**

* * *

"Are you sure you can handle this?"

"We won't know till I try, now give me the damn thing,"

"Red, I'm very protective of these-"

"Yeah, and it's not like I'm gonna start randomly hitting things with it like we're at a rock concert or something."

It was our third practice together and I decided I was sick of practicing in my tiny room. So, we were now in his slightly larger room….Change of scenery I guess. About five minutes ago I spotted that he did in fact own another guitar, because most serious players do, and I wanted to learn how to play it.

I've never seen him look more frightened then when I picked it up. He literally ran over to me and grabbed it out of my hands. Now he was talking to me like I was a child who tried to take a cookie out of the jar before supper.

"You're a klutz. Sit down and I'll hand it to you."

I obliged and he reluctantly handed the black acoustic back to me…which I automatically pretended to drop. "Oh shit!"

Immediately, he positioned himself as if he was going to catch it, "…Not funny,"

"So funny. If you only saw your face,"

With his face stony he reached for the instrument, "Haha, give it back,"

"Nope," I mumbled, moving further back on his bed to get out of his reach, " If you try to take it off of me, I will be forced to use it to defend myself."

"Like you even have the guts to hit me with that thing,"

"Wanna test that theory?" I questioned with raised eyebrows and a wide grin.

What the hell am I doing? I will swear to you all on my father's grave…alright, my mother's grave, that nothing has happened. But when I'm around him my flirty knob is cranked up to eleven…I can't help it.

Resistance is futile.

I'm going to hell for hitting on some baby's daddy….

* * *

"You don't get it. She's crazy man, like seriously insane….She baked me a cake with her face on it!" Apparently Finn was having some trouble with his partner.

"Dude, she's just a chick. Calm down," Puck shrugged in return.

"Was the picture in color?" I questioned, finding this way funnier than I should.

"No, black and white, why?" Finn replied looking terrified as if my answer was one of life and death.

"No reason,"

The four of us, meaning myself & Puck and Finn & Rachel, were waiting for the rest of the club to show up.

"Anyway, if I hadn't walked in when I did, I'm not sure Finn would've lived to tell the tale," Rachel commented with a voice that was either annoyed or content with her ability to end some level of awkward strangeness that wasn't her own.

"Did Regan survive this horrific ordeal?" I asked Rachel, half sarcastic half curious.

With a nod and a grin she said, "I think she got the hint when I threw a piece of cake on her windshield."

"What a rebel." Puck said in a sarcastic tone similar to my own as the rest of the club began to fill the room. Soon all the seats were filled, I was by Puck and Finn was sandwiched between Rachel and Regan.

"Alright guys, I've got some news before we start practice." Mr. Shue started the moment he stepped in front of us, "I know its still early, but I decided to go for it anyway. Barry's Car Dealership is sponsoring a talent contest and I've entered New Directions."

"But wait, Mr. Shue isn't this like the whole mattress thing we did last year?" Artie asked curiously, and I silently wished that I knew what the hell he was talking about.

"Actually no its not. We only got in trouble for that because I accidentally excepted one of the mattresses that was sent as payment for your services, it technically made you guys professionals….This is a contest, no one is getting paid here."

Not being able to help myself I whispered to Puck, "Mattresses?"

"I'll explain later," he muttered back.

"So what's the prize?" Finn asked from the front row, hope shining in his eyes.

"Yeah, I could really use a new set of wheels," Puck added from next to me.

"Ah, sorry guys, no cars, just a trophy and bragging rights." Shue answered with a smile.

A second later Rachel's hand was in the air, "Then what exactly is the point? I mean we should really be holding out for better opportunities. I-we shouldn't have to lower our standards to something below a county fair."

"The point is, Rachel, we don't get that many opportunities to perform in front of an audience, this give us the chance to do that. So, any questions?"

"What exactly will we be performing?" Rachel asked for the rest of us.

"_I've Had the Time of My Life, _at least if that ok with you guys?"

Of course everyone nodded in agreement, because who was really going to refuse to do a song we kicked ass at. Even Rachel, who was obviously bitter, ok'ed the song choice.

"Great, everybody up and we'll start warming up. And remember, tomorrows the day you guys perform your own duets."

* * *

"Look little mermaid," wait, did she seriously just call me that? "Puck and I might not be dating, but hands off or I'll remove them for you, got it?" Santana said after practice cornering me at the exit before I started my walk home.

"I didn't realize-"

"Yeah well now ya do,"

"Fine, if he's really with somebody else then I'll stop with the entirely innocent and meaningless flirting your highness"

I'm gonna get my ass kicked by a cheerleader.

Still ticked and clearly not completely convinced Santana left taking Britney with her toward the parking lot. Before they were completely out of earshot I heard Britney say, "But I thought mermaids only lived in the ocean," I think that poor girl needs to be put on medication.

Finally I started walking home only for a car to pull up alongside me. Thoughts of various club members beating me to death with tire irons crossed my mind until I saw that Quinn was behind the wheel….Then I had the image of her shooting me and stuffing me in her trunk _Goodfellas_ to worry about.

"Lily, right?" she called through the open passenger window. When I nodded she asked, "Need a ride?" For some reason I had a feeling that this wasn't really about me getting a ride home, so I got in the car.

After answering a few questions about where I lived I finally asked, "So ahhh, you aren't gonna like drive me somewhere and threaten to kill me…or really kill me for flirting with Puck, are you?"

"If I was going to do that I'd imagine that I wouldn't have picked you up in public," she replied with a small laugh before continuing, "Look Lily-"

"Puck's yours, hands off? I totally get it…I'll do it more for your sake than Santana's."

Quinn sent me a sideways look before turning back to the road and saying, "Actually, I was going to tell you to ignore her."

"Wait…really? I mean, is that really a good idea seeing as she could probably kill me with a super-cheerleader-high kick or something."

She thought about it before shrugging, "Yeah she probably could, but she's more about threats than actions. Honestly Lily, I think Puck likes you."

I cut her off with a smile and a sigh, "From what I've heard Puck likes anything with boobs. From what I've seen Puck loved you."

"That was never the problem."

This whole ride was a little weird and now the vibe was even weirder than before, "…Ok, cuz that isn't cryptic…but, just let me get this straight, are you giving me your blessing to, ya know, date Puck?"

"Yeah, pretty much….I mean I really do think he likes you, like really likes you."

I sucked in a breath and nodded at the windshield, "Alrighty then…but seriously what makes you think that he likes me?"

What? I had to ask, okay?

"Sometimes when he looks at you, it's the same way he used to look at me before everything got all dramatic and messed up."

I honestly had no idea how to respond.

"Lily, I'm not…I'm not telling you to date him or anything, I'm just letting you know that I'm totally okay with it. That is if you want to, I mean I won't stand in your way or anything."

"Thanks…for that, but-"

"You're not sure yet, I completely understand. Just know that…he's isn't everything everybody says he is."

Finally she pulled in front of my house, "So, ahhhh, thank you?"

"No problem, see you tomorrow."

"See ya," and with that I got out of the car, feeling more than a little dazed and confused.

* * *

"You ok, you're acting really weird…and for you that's saying something, cuz you're always weird" Puck said from where he sat against the wall, pausing his guitar mid verse. Looking at me sitting on his bed, with an annoyed scowl…its really the only word I can use to describe it. We were once again practicing in his room and by this point even I knew I was acting way weirder than normal.

"No" a voice two octaves higher than my normal one replied for me, "No, I'm fine…just a-a sore throat." I muttered while clearing my throat…for effect. "Just, like keep playing."

He went to start up again, but stopped, "Seriously, what's going on? Did, I don't know, someone die that I should know about?"

"No…why would you…never mind, no one is dead. I'm just…I mean its just, its just been a really freaky day." I sighed without looking at him, cause now that I actually have it _in_ my head that I might have a chance with this whole Puck thing, I can't get it _out _of my head. So, now I can't seem to stop blushing whenever I look at him. This is only one of my Puck-functional problems at that moment, the shortness of breath was really messing with my voice.

"Fine, whatever, but could you stop screwing up. We had this down and perfected yesterday, at this rate we'll be worse ones up there tomorrow and I honestly don't feel like sucking stage in front of them, alright?"

"Alright, fine. I swear I'll try not to suck."

"Thank you." and a moment later he picked up were he left off.

And I sucked…we are so screwed.

* * *

**So yeah, I've seen the favorites and everything and that is awesome of you guys but, I live on reviews...so please press that little button...please? I know I know I always do this, but I can't help it lol.**


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